Sunday, July 2, 2017

Wear your 'TIE' for a great conversation!!

This is NOT a post about how to 'Tie a Tie'.  Rather , just an effort to remember a few fundamentals before we strike a conversation with someone. 

Too often, a conversation results in wasted time.  'TIE' -   I am using here as a ref. to help us remember these fundamentals which can help add meaning to your conversations and ensure  effective outcomes.

  T I E ,  Let's break it down:  

      T= Time and Timing.
      I=  Interest and Information
      E= Energy and Emphasize

Time and Timing ( T ): 

Devoting genuine and sincere 'time' for any conversation is key to ensure a good two way dialogue.

At the same time opening up on a topic requires certain atmosphere or frame of mind which I am referring here as 'timing'.

Interest and Information (I): 

Good conversation is never one-sided.  When we talk to someone , our brain is unconsciously but constantly searching for -  where the individual's interests lies. Think of a Venn diagram. When you find these intersections of interests , these conversations flows with great intensity and becomes very lively. We like people who are like us! 

Some other tips would be -  asking genuine questions in between ,  keep asking yourself how you can add value into this ongoing conversation, endear them!

I personally believe that  -  before going for any planned meeting,  we should always arm ourselves with the topic. The Information element.   And if we could  not - we can just support the ongoing  discussion. For. ex. say “I don’t know a lot, but I do know that…”

Never try yo  dominate a conversation.  Conversational Narcissism is bad!  Really bad!  On the other hand we should NOT be a non-contributor either.

Don’t overshare  - don't  be someone who pours out his life story as soon as you meet him. Within couple of  minutes you know why his girlfriend dumped him..etc. etc.

Energy and Emphasize (E):

By 'energy' I do not mean exercising extremes in autonomy or to dominate a conversation ,  BUT a well balance mix of -  effective body language , gesture , stance , pitch and pace.

This is NOT about exerting overuse of energy which might add noise to the conversation , rather bringing your  'whole being'  into the conversation.

We also must 'emphasize' the important words and effectively underline important points during such conversations.

Above all these ,  let's also remember the saying - "the key to the art of conversation is not in the talking, but in the listening"

Well , that's it for now!  Wear this 'TIE' to add meaning to your  next conversation ,  and see if it helps! :))   Don't forget to share your experience.


  1. Two words - precise and thought provoking!
    Thanks for the write up. Looking forward to many more...

  2. I liked the way you have put all the points succintly and TIEd down all the points in a clear and precise owner . Next time when I have a conversation will make sure I wear your TIE . The one TIE for all occasions and conversations.
    Meanwhile keep blogging more often dude . Love to read more insightful and interesting anecdotes and whinings from you.

  3. Never thought conversation could be broken up to this. Unknowingly, I have been making a lot of mistakes in my conversations. I will remember this.


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